I could fill in lots of other details but ultimately the pattern is a sadly common one You may have seen it o Daniel was a godly well-intentioned husband who showed his love in several ways including working long hours provide for his family and do nice things for them You see for him providing is unately he didn’t realize that what he was working so hard for wasn’t what Jessica most needed—and in some ways was actually robbing her of the closeness she needed the most (And of course there were ways she didn’t know she was hurting him.) What she needed most more than all the expensive vacations in the world were a few simple specific day--day as simple as loving gestures in public? you wonder. Adapted from The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy s by Shaunti Feldhahn copyright © 2013 Excerpted by permission of WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group a division of Penguin Random House LLC All rights reserved No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher. Join THE 1,000,000 MEMBER CHALLENGE: If you haven’t already done it what are you waiting for? Join the club! It takes only a few seconds and of course is free There’S no looking back for our friends Jessica and Daniel But I’m so thankful that God is good He is always at work redeem our broken hearts—and I know He’ll do it for our friends Still a corner of my heart mourns the heartbreak that might have been prevented if they had truly undersod the power of doing these best little all know that small thoughtful acts are not a magic cure-all for every problem But having talked so many who nurtured much happiness with simple but powerful actions I know all of us can build that all-important foundation that helps us believe that our mate notices and e as it turns out believing that the other person cares is far more important building a happy than most of us ever realized. With this in mind I asked around for advice small ways that people can their love and their day This doesn't include therapy or major sucking up or any major effort on the part of anyone These are small things that can make a big difference So here are 10 important ways you can your RIGHT NOW See below: Apologize when you are wrong: Forget pride If you realize you are wrong in a fight admit it and say you are sorry It will make a world of difference in terms of staying close Imagine the other person gone during a fight: There is no better way sp a fight than imagine losing or missing the other person That sadness? That tightness in your chest? That's the love you feel. I discovered something yesterday Well really I rediscovered it Our members give fantastic advice! Yesterday in our Facebook community I posed two simple questions: Have you been married more than 10 years? If so will you share something here encourage those newer ? Within hours more than 600 people responded Women seasoned in shared their perspectives tips advice and encouraged those in their first 10 years of Those in the early years of their union reciprocated overwhelmingly with gratitude the women who had just fanned their flames of hope It was a beautiful exchange. 5 Pulls himself out of a funk when he’s morose grumpy or upset about something instead of withdrawing (This doesn’t mean he doesn’t get angry or need space; it means he tries pull himself out of it.) This deeply pleases 72 percent of all that unlock any doorDid you notice that all these happiness-inducing actions are simple learnable and doable by any wife or any husband? If you put each of the five biggest little things work every day I’m betting your will —in some cases here’s more great news: All these small but powerful actions matter regardless of what the person’s love language is For example most wives (82 percent) are affected when her husband reaches out and takes her hand regardless of whether physical uch is. Laugh more: For me this is the biggest secret 10 years of My husband and I crack each other up We roll on the floor laughing and genuinely enjoy each other's company This is what keeps us strong Arrange weekly meetings: If you have young kids and two careers there is nothing more important than having weekly "meetings." It may not be romantic but neither is nagging and this curbs that a lot From a friend who has started them: "It has been very helpful from a practical side of just getting through everyday life as a team." Amen Schedule sex: It's not romantic but in our busy lives it's necessary Pencil that shite in because you know what's less romantic? A sexless Talk about the little things: Talk about the big things but also discuss the little things Talk and then talk some more The more you talk the more. Yes! My research on happy couples showed that an extraordinarily high percentage of them were (often without realizing it!) doing a few little specific actions that were making their spouses feel deeply cared for Jessica as it turns out is like nearly all other men and women in her deep rooted desire for these surprisingly meaningful --day actionsClearly a few small actions won’t fix deep relationship problems But for most of us a handful of simple day--day actions increase the likelihood that our spouse feels that we care deeply about them instead of feeling that we don’t There’s just enormous power. While reading through them I found myself pumping my fist in the air like I was at a ball game yelling “Yes! Yes! Yes!” I knew almost immediately those encouragements needed also be shared here with you And although the below advice isn’t any better than the hundreds of others on our community page (I certainly wouldn’t attempt rank them) I could only post a few here so I hope you’ll click the link at the botm see the rest Without further ado here are 50 tips for making. Written by Sasha Brown-Worsham on CafeMom's blog The Stir is not easy When you've seen people who make it 10 15 and 30 years gether you know you are looking at two people who have fought compromised and stayed committed one another through a lot There's a lot be learned from these people But s don't fail from big problems at least not all the time Very often people end up splitting over the small things especially once the small things. A wife will have a big impact on her husband’s happiness when she does the following:1 Notices his effort and sincerely thanks him for it (For example she says “Thank you for mowing the lawn even though it was so hot outside.” Or “Thanks for playing with the kids even when you were so tired from work.”) This deeply pleases 72 percent of all men.2 Says “You did a great job at __________.” This deeply pleases 69 percent of all men.3 Mentions in front of others something he did well This deeply pleases 72 percent of all men.4 Shows that she desires him sexually and that he pleases her sexually This deeply pleases 85 percent of all men.5 Makes it clear him that he makes her happy (For example she expresses appreciation for something he did for her with a smile words a big hug etc.) This deeply pleases 88 percent of. Start your day off right with an uplifting 90-second message delivered your mailbox.